Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A New Day

Funny thing... The person who had to knock some sense into me was the board of parole (Ill call him parollie- He was this adorable bald man so he reminded me just for a second of a rollie pollie).

Yesterday went like I expected. My father has an unofficial release date- much sooner than i thought. My outlook has changed though- unlike the feelings I had yesterday I feel peace today. The board always seem so incredibly educated. I find it fascinating when we have gone to these, listening to them be so neutral in such a difficult and sensitive situation. Yesterday was no different and parollie for the most part didn't disappoint. Among almost giving the "I had a dream" speech he gave a pretty good reality check to my father. He told him that their is a label on him whether he likes it or not and he will forever have that label. However- its up to him to live off that label. I never thought I put a label on myself- in fact I thought I tried really hard not to. Of course I had some extra drama like moments but I thought I was doing good. After realizing that just the thought of my father made me feel 11 again I knew I was labeling myself. I didn't like that and I am not that person. I have been labeled that in court and in other titles through this ordeal but I didn't really think I put it on myself to. I had some tears and some anger but I wiped them away and thought back to parollies wise words of not living by my label and seeing that its a new day. Not only me and my family but the whole country can make everyday a new day. Yesterday was a day many people have been waiting years and years for. With this new start in a new day who knows what amazing things could happen for everyone!

** Thank you everyone for your sweet and encouraging words!


Esther said...

That is a good insight, thanks for sharing. I'm happy that day is over for you, and that it went pretty well.

Cassidy Ratliff said...

Wow...where does time seems like yesterday you were doing this same thing. I am glad that you are at peace and that you have something better to look forward to (your baby). Don't ever let you protective guard down ya tons!


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