Tuesday, August 16, 2011

First Step

So we had our first meeting to begin this process.
Ryan couldn't get off on time so I was stressing.
The lady told me we both need to be there.
Luckily she was patient and we chatted until Ryan got there 45 min. late.
She asked lots of questions.
She quizzed us on several areas about our life.
She gave us a million papers.
She answered all of our questions.
I think we passed because we are already signed up for most of the to-do's we have to complete.
Its definitely not a quick process. We have a lot to do before we can even be considered.
So we are getting ready.
I hope this is the way to go.
I feel its right.
and when the lady asked Ryan why he wants to do this... His answer was better than any I could come up with. I know how much he wants to be a Dad. I know how much he wants to love again. I know how incredible he will be once again.
This will be a learning process. We will learn patience. A different kind of love.
We will experience grief, happiness, fear, anger, joy and excitement.
We want this. More than anything in the whole world. We want to be a family. We want our family.
My heart is growing and preparing for this new person who will soon fill it.
I pray they come.
Who ever, however, whenever.
I don't care what you look like, where you came from or who you will grow to be.
I will love you. More than anyone could love you.


Jeska said...

best of luck during the process!

Unknown said...

I am a complete stranger to you, but I stumbled on your blog some time ago. I am a wife and mom to 2 little girls... you'll have to forgive me when I say I'm now a blog stalker :) At least every other day, I check in to see if you have posted anything new. Your story touched me from the moment I began reading. Your daughter is absolutely beautiful. My heart broke for you and your husband as I read your story. I was in awe and completely humbled, how you somehow embodied the courage and strength as your daughter made her way to heaven. It seems an impossible task to endure. And I want to thank you for sharing Makenzie's life with all of us. Her legacy lives on through your words, your love, your laughter, your life. I don't think you realize how many people you touch, how many families you help to give their children a few extra kisses each day. I thank you. My little girls thank you. You and your daughter are often in my prayers, asking the Lord to bless you and your husband, to keep Makenzie alive in your hearts, and to bless you with the love and support you need to you begin this new journey.
Amber (california)

Em said...

Step 1 down....you can do it, one step at a time. Keep the end goal in focus and although tough, a long process, it will happen. You and Ryan are incredible parents and the love you have to give and share with another little person is so evident! I can't wait to see who is meant to join your wonderful family. Love and hugs,Em

Jenni said...

Wow, I have goose bumps! Congrats on starting this process, congrats on being ready, congrats on having the faith and courage to take this next step. No one will ever take the place of your precious baby girl but I think you may find that you have more love than you ever even imagined. Thinking of you and wishing you the best!!! :)

Jenni said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jenni said...

(The deleted comment was me, mine accidentally posted twice. :))

Heather said...

I recommend the adoption forum/social network site adoptionvoices.com and welcome into the adoption community!

Shawna said...

Yeah for getting through the initial meeting! Sorry it was a little stressful but glad it went well for the most part. Just remember, all this time the process takes will be all the time God needs to prepare you for your new little one and to prepare that little one for you :).

P.S. My baby sister is adopted and my parents could not have been happier with the results of the process. She is the perfect addition to our family. So hang in there, you will find the perfect addition to your family as well.

Anonymous said...

Good Luck on this new journey. My Aunt was adopted and her and my uncle just adopted. They are very happy and very much thrilled with adoption. I love having a new cousin. I had waited a long time to have her and she is one amazing and wonderful little girl and I wish you the same joy that they have.

Kami Satterlee said...

So excited for you both, what a fun and thrilling journey to find that special brother or sister for Makenzie.
I know there are thousands of blogs on adopting, but I just love this little family and thought you might want to check them out too.


Ryan and Ann have adopted 3 girls from all different countries and are currently waiting for their #4 a baby boy from China. They are adorable!

Anonymous said...

Congrats on taking that first step. How exciting! I just wondered if you'd ever considered embryo adoption at all? That way you'd get to experience pregnancy again. Just a thought that crossed my mind. You, ryan and Makenzie continue to inspire me to be a better wife and mother with the love you share and show each other. Looking fwd to sharing this journey with you.

Robin said...

Whomever this baby/child is, they are so lucky! Whether they are born yet, or not, they are waiting for you guys! Gods plan is perfect, and He is watching over you all. Blessings be with you, Ryan and this child during this process.

Alerie said...

Good luck on this new journey for your family. I'm so excited for you guys. You guys are already amazing parents and I know that you will be to this child. My thoughts and prayers are always with you.

Toni ~ Mom to 8 heavenly Angels and 1 earthly Angel. said...

I stumbled across your blog from another I have been following, and I can’t tell you how excited I am for you, Congrats. We too are also starting this process for the 2nd time, but hoping this one works. I hope you don’t mind if I follow you, I'm thrilled to watch any Angel Mom and Dad find and reach for their dreams, it’s very hard after learning to let go of part of your world and dreams. Remember "Some Miracles take time, but they do happen." Best of luck!
And I'll tell you this, time dose not "ease" the pain, you learn to live with it as part of your "new" life, I'm still learning to live.

Anonymous said...

I am a stranger to you, but am also one that stumbled across your blog. I'm sorry for your loss, it is heartbreaking to say the least.

However, I am also excited for you guys to be starting the adoption process. We have adopted 3 beautiful kids and adoption is the best thing to happen to us. It can be a roller coaster ride, but is sooooo worth it. Best wishes to you!


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