Happy Bday Beehive

Happy 24Th of July!
My Mom loves to get tickets for the Bees game every year and invites all who will want to come. Since she started my sister Kristianne and I have gone EVERY YEAR! We have a lot of fun watching the game, pigging out on snow cones and dippin dots, people watching and finally enjoying the fireworks. We had so much fun hanging out together- until the fireworks show when both Kristianne and I got a dumb ash fall into our eye ball! I swear I almost went blind. I was panicking. It was burning and I almost called 911! Okay Ryan thought I was getting a little out of hand but that's usually how I am.

Cute Cute OliviaJust Ryan and KendraKristianne and OliviaFunny Faces Mom and Jesse

Happy Birthday To RYAN!

I am a big slacker of a wife and don't have any pictures of my amazing husband to post- OOPS.

Ill get some loaded within the next few days :)

July 20 1984 was the day this world was changed for forever because Sir Ryan Webster was born! Oh my prince charming! I could fill this blog along with a few more blogs about how lucky I am to not only know someone like Ryan but be married to Ryan. He is more than I could have ever asked for. Since the day we got married Ryan continues to surprise me with his love. He is so understanding with all the issues I have and all the problems I face on a daily basic. He was never an affectionate person. He did not share his feelings and he likes his space. Oh can I be anymore the opposite! Ryan is always holding me extra longer, sending me a letter, calling just because and showering me with complements. I don't know how I have flipped this boy around but I think its simply because he is such a loyal and devoted husband. Ryan demonstrates how great of a father he is going to be when we have Devlin and Teagan. He loves them so much and will do anything for them.

Last year I had a huge surprise party for Ryan (cowboy themed) haha... We had so many people over and such a huge bash that we decided to play it a little low key this year. Friday night we went out with his good friends from work for dinner. Saturday we went shopping for bday presents and a new outfit then headed off to the PBR. Grandma Diane watched baby Harley while we headed off to the Little America. It was so fun ordering room service, movies and staying up late. After we got a late check out we headed home for our family pool and pizza party. Ryan got some great gifts from his family and mine. He is so spoiled :)

Ill make sure to get some pictures of the birthday boy himself soon!

PBR

So Ryan and I are in love with country! I am in love with cowboys! Ryan's dream is to be a bull rider. He is going to be taking classes this next year and he just cant wait. Well we have made a tradition to go to the PBR finals in Vegas every year. Its always the last week of Oct and first week of Nov. We already have our tickets and cant wait! Whenever the PBR (any series) comes through Utah we always go. This year it was during the Days of 47 Rodeo. We had such a blast. We had great seats on the 4Th row on the floor. We could almost touch the bulls :)






So here are some great pictures. My cowboys to the left some awesome bull riding above and this one guy was amazing with his horses and buffa-LO. They would do all these tricks just by his howls and cracking of his whip. They were turning in circes on his trailer and running one way or the other. It was awesome and he is a TRUE cowboy- AHH!

Just a Hint

Someone does something wrong-they say sorry-you forgive!
That's the way it goes right? What if someone does something really bad? What if they did something that has shaped the rest of your life for the bad? Do you still need to forgive those people? I started this blog just thinking ill put up some fun pictures and use it as a little journal (because I'm so bad at keeping one myself) I have seen some blogs that are very personal- when I have told some people to look at them since they inspire me and they come back with- why would they publish something like that? I started thinking wow- maybe I shouldn't write such personal things- who wants to hear that. Well if you don't want to hear it I'm going to tell it anyway simply because even if your not listening I am talking and it feels good to get it out. I need to talk and I need to find some kind of therapy in this world. I hate complaining and no matter what has or will ever happen in my life I don't ever want someone to feel sorry for me. Life happens for a reason and even if its a hard issue I believe it was suppose to happen to me. I will never say "Why Me." I thought years ago that I wanted to stare a little part of my story with others because when I was going through things I always wanted someone who could relate to me through all the trauma. Believe me I think I had it really well compared to what others have had to go through in life. I like to hear how people deal with their struggles and how they over come them because I really learn from that. So here I go, my blog will be my journal and a way to release my mind. I talk to other esp my amazing husband but sometimes I want to tell it to the world but not make others feel obligated to give me a response. If you don't like these kinds of blogs- don't read mine.
I got a letter today, its not the first time I have received a letter like this- actually I have received quite a few over the last few months. Ever since I am now an adult and the courts have removed the "no contact" order. The letters always have so much in it that I get sleepy after trying to interpret them. Not only because of poor word structure but because of the way he talks. A foreign language is the best way to describe it. Half the letter it leaves me sad, feeling guilty and missing. The other part leaves me angry, feelings of hate and confusion. You can only imagine the big block of information that is shoved into usually 3-4 pages. This particular letter first came with my married name on the envelope. You may not think anything of that however I never told him my married name. The last he knows me as, Kendra White. I have made a point to not let him know. Well the secrets out. The letters have always been sent to a different address not to my home. In the middle of the 3rd page of this letter he describes my little brother and his relationship. My anger is boiling. I don't like him talking about this perfect little person that was traumatized by the choices he made. Jonathan, who always dreamed of being just like him when he grew up but Jonathan soon all the sudden realized he would be nothing like him. I am very protective over Jonathan. The letter goes on- and he says the words that I don't want to hear- He wants pictures so he can have "just a hint" of my life.
All I can think is that this is my life now. For the most part he has not been in it since I was 13. Just a hint would mean giving him an image. He has the image of a little 13 year old girl who doesn't know what the hell is going on in this world. Now I'm an adult and stronger than he could imagine. This "just a hint" will give him everything I have been working to create for myself and leaving him out of.

That little girl is the old me.

Family walk in the Mountains

We went on a walk with Ryan's family last night. We had a lot of fun just being together. The weather was perfect and it was fun to see some of the animals! Harley and Addison I think had a great time just being outside! Addison was so excited to drink from a water bottle, she kept smiling and laughing.

Devlin and Teagan

We had a fun weekend with Devlin and Teagan. We were very busy and lets just say Kendra never slept. Teagan is a great baby though! Devlin had a hard weekend. He is a 5 year old and doesn't want rules and being told No. Poor guy shed to many tears but Kendra usually joined right in with him. Devlin has his own room but didn't want to sleep in there this weekend. He had to sleep where ever Kendra and Ryan were. Teagan is a typical 2 month old and wakes up a few times through the night so Kendra slept down stairs with Teagan and Devlin while Ryan got a good night rest with Harley in our bed. We didn't go to a water park but we did take Devlin to Kangaroo Jump which is a great bounce house place. He had a great time jumping, flipping and running! We also got a slip and slide this summer and Devlin loves it. Ryan got a great idea to make it more slippery and put dish soap all over it! Devlin flew over the end a few times. It was so much fun to have these kids even when its not always the easiest :)

UPDATE

Well for all the things I was going to do differently yesterday- well I'm sad to say I didn't do near as well as I wish I would have. Yesterday was not the best day so I failed in a few departments!

These are the things I DID do:

-I was not crazy in traffic!

-I got my husband a card and thanked him for letting me have a girls party

-I thanked God

-I kept a smile on my face even if it was forced

-I was grateful it was Thursday-NIGHT

So I failed to walk my poor dog, I didn't make dinner instead we went out to eat at our favorite restaurant, I didn't stay up late watching the stars I actually stayed up late cleaning and doing laundry, It wasn't the emails that kept me busy it was the "issues", I had only a few neg thoughts in my head. So today and this weekend will be better! It was just one of those days!

Today has already started out as a wonderful day! I got up at 5 AM to start getting ready so I could talk to my brother Ben on our web cam at 6 AM. As I logged on I couldn't help but shack with anticipation to see my brother for the first time on our new web cam! I was worried he wouldnt be on but-He was logged on! woohoo.. I got to see my nieces, Ben and MyungLim. Ah it was so great to hear them and see them but It made me sick how much I miss them. Ryan and I just bought a new computer for the simple fact that I NEEDED to start seeing my brother! So we got a very nice laptop with a camera built in! They all looked so big and cute. My chubby little Donna was not so chubby anymore, she was thin! Well thin for those girls :) My brother has healthy babies! Ah my nieces are so beautiful. I have already called Ryan and told him we are starting to plan our next trip to see them. I don't care how much it cost I'm going next year! haha... We have actually been talking about maybe going again for Christmas next year. I think ill try to stay 2 weeks and Ryan will only stay 1. Oops maybe I should ask my brother if we are even welcome :) Love you BEN!!! I'm coming whether you like it or not!

So for this weekend Ill start doing better today at staying positive we have Devlin and Teagan so we will be very busy. I think we are going to try and take them to a water park- Well take Devlin. Teagan and I will hang out under a tree or something :)

Just for today -part 2-

Just for today I'm going to enter a watermelon eating contest and come in 3rd!

Oh boy oh boy it was something else to experience :)

Let me warn you that these are NOT flattering! It was horrible lighting and the hair nets DON'T make anyone look that attractive!

The Crew! The cute girl to the left of me was the winner!!!

(Let me just add that I dont know why im standing like I have to pee)

EAT EAT EAT

It was something I have never done before but it was so much fun! My nose is hurting really bad though because the juice went up there! I got a little melon in my eye as well so its now red. I guess those are the prices to pay to try and be Ms. Watermelon Champ!

Just for today!

Just for today...

- Ill let 2 people over in traffic instead of 1

- I will sit back and drive the speed limit instead of trying to get to work in record time

- I will go out of my way to buy my husband a card thanking him for letting me have a girls party last night and keeping my dog and himself out of the house

- There will not be a negative thought about anyone run through my head

- I will make a very healthy dinner that both my husband and I will actually eat :)

- The amount of emails that come in will not keep me from asking everyone who walks by my desk how they are doing

- The pressure of the future will not drive me crazy

- I will thank God every chance I get for all my blessings

- Ill send 2 letters to my brother Jonathan

- I will take my dog for a nice long walk and enjoy just being able to do that

- Ill keep a smile on my face until my checks hurt

- I will stay up late to watch the sun go down and see the stars come out instead of gluing myself to the tube

- Ill be grateful its still Thursday

I'm breaking out of the mold today. I have decided to make some small changes just for today. I think everyone should try this and tell me what you think!

Life

There is this amazing family out in the blog world that I accidentally came across a few weeks ago. This family recently lost their youngest baby to a tragic accident and she is telling her story on here. I check in everyday just to see her inspirational words. I probably shouldn't keep looking at it while I'm at work because without fail I cry every time I even open it up. She is such an amazing women. Seeing her emotions as she deals with this is eye opening. I cant help but sit back and realize what a great life I have. How lucky I am to have the things and people I do in my life.
I was 9 years old when my best friend/sister died. I can still feel the same pain I did the first time I found out. Since she died its rare that a day goes by that I don't think of her however over this past year she has been in my mind even more. I am at the age now that she was when she got in a car accident and lost her life. I think to myself if today was my last day would I have done the things I want to on this earth? Will my family and esp my husband know how much I truly love them? Those frustrated words I used with Ryan last night could be the last words he ever hears- Is that how I want to leave him?
Now I'm not saying ill be leaving anytime soon- believe me- I have so much more to learn and do before its my turn but I don't know when that will be. This blog that this wonderful family is doing keeps me so focused on how precious life is. I see how amazing these little children that come from God are. Every time one of my nieces or nephews has been born I cant help but have one of my first thoughts be that my sister was the last one to hold them before she gave them to us. I feel so close to her at those times. Some day when I am privileged enough to have my own children I don't know what I'm going to do when I get to hold my baby for the first time. I cant help but cry already thinking how special that is going to be.
I hope you can all check out this blog and see how life changing it is!
http://adailyscoop.blogspot.com/

I love my Freedom!

Happy 4Th of July!

I want to first thank every troop out there for all the hard and dedicated work you all do for us everyday to keep our freedom. To give us a day like July 4Th to celebrate. I am lucky enough to have an amazing brother who diligently serves our country everyday and risks his life for everyone of us! I see his pictures and heard his words while in Iraq and cant believe how strong all those men and women are over there. Everywhere- Not just Iraq but every military base in the world! I have a few other close friends who also served and I'm speechless of the things they see and do on a daily basis. You are all truly angels. I cant find enough words to express how truly grateful I am for each and everyone of you! It really takes a hero to be a solider!

Thank You and I love you all!

Wedding Bells!

Mr. and Mrs. Derek Anderson!

My Allie got married to her high school sweetheart last Wednesday!
I was privileged enough to attend their wedding and reception.
All I have to say is I want to get married (to Ryan) again. It was so beautiful. I really was taken back how special and inmate the whole thing was. Allie was the most beautiful bride I have ever seen. Her dress was gorgeous and it looked perfect on her. Their little girl Emma was the cutest little thing. She did such a great job being the flower girl. They had a great line full of family and friends who all looked amazing to! The ceremony was short and perfect (just how I like it) they each said a little something to each other which almost make me fall over with emotion. Their words to each other were so sweet and amazing. I really cant get enough of how great their wedding went and I am so excited for them both. Derek was a great friend to me for many years! Oh we go way back with lots of laughs. Allie has been there for me since we were young little freshman. She has always been such a great friend and I cant imagine my life without these 2. I love you all so much and I wish you a lifetime of happiness!

Ahh I love Weddings. I could have one every weekend!

Check out my Slide Show!

Be Careful!

So I had a wake up call on Monday afternoon!

I don't take lunches very often because I get pretty busy at work but I decided to meet my Mallory for lunch. Running late anyway I was trying to hurry and get there driving at record speed for down town SLC. We were going to met at the Bakery which is on 300E and 300S. I was stopped at a red light only blocks from my destination watching this older women cross the street with her little walker. My mind was running on all the things that I need to do today and feeling over whelmed when in a split second another car made a left hand turn across the street and ran over this little old lady! Her walker went flying prob. 30 feet and I quickly searched the street to see where this lady was. She was laying on the ground shaking back and forth. The driver of the car that hit her jumped out and ran over to her. I shoved my car in park in the middle of the street and jumped out running over to her. I started to cradle her back so that she would fall over more. Blood was pouring out of her head blocking her vision. A few other people came running over and we all kept trying to talk to her. She wouldnt respond and kept looking at us like we were crazy nuts and wondering what just happened. I was so worried at first because she wouldn't say anything. I finally got her to sit down on her butt but I worried that the 100 degree pavement would burn her. Everyone kept shouting not to move her not to move her. She finally spoke and asked for some water. I ran to grab her some water from my car not knowing she shouldn't drink if she has a head injury. Don't worry though a nice lady screamed and threw the water bottle back at me telling me she cant drink anything. We all helped apply pressure to her head and a few other people held a blanket to shield her from the sun. The paramedics were there withing probably 5 minutes. They snatched her up and drove her away. I had to spend another 15 minutes filling out a police report before I was finally off to meet Mallory.

For the rest of the day I kept thinking about this lady. I prayed she would be fine and I think she is but how scary a simple mistake can be. It really made me realize I need to be more careful not only driving on the main roads but esp in my neighborhood. I have so many little kids running around all day that it could be so easy to accidentally hit one of them. I really don't think I could live with myself if I did that either. AHH... What a scary reality check!

Yuba Lake Pictures

Yuba Lake

We had the best weekend relaxing at Yuba Lake. The weather was HOT and PERFECT! We love going boating and camping. Ryan and I took Devlin and Kailum up Friday night along with Amy and her kids Aidan, Kian and Amalie. We spent the night hanging out and skipping rocks in the water. Our camp spot was right on the beach which made it perfect to go play anytime. The next day we ate breakfast and were on the boat by 9:00 AM. Amy and Aidan were the first to ride the tube. They did awesome and Aidan kept saying he would never get off. Everyone got a turn but Amalie-who is to little and Ryan who hurt his back earlier in the week and didn't feel up to getting beat up a little more on the tube. The kids all had a blast and Harley is a natural fish. She cant stay out of the water. She will swim and try to catch the water she is splashing around. I love getting on the tube and I challenge anyone to try and flip me off. For some reason when I get on that thing I get unbelievable strength and will hold on for forever. Ryan loves playing the game of almost killing me just to get me to fall off. The tube will flip in every direction and ill just pull myself back up and hold on! That is the only time I have any kind of strength. I'm actually very weak!

Later in the night after Amy went home my sister Kristianne and her daughter Olivia came up. We had a great time playing a little more on the boat then swimming at the beach. That night the kids all snuggled in the tent and watched a movie on my computer while Ryan, Kristianne and I made friends which a group of people camping next to us. They were a lot of fun and we had a great time hanging out with them. The next morning, which was Sunday, we were back in the water for a while before heading home. It was a perfect get away and I cant wait till next weekend when we do it again but at a different lake.

Happy Birthday KK

Oh my little Kailum is no longer little.

He is now in the double digits!

10!

He is an amazing skateboarder! Among many of his other talents!

Kailum has grown up so fast and is definitely a little adult.

He is so sweet to everyone and gives the best hugs- I love that he isn't to old to hug his aunt Kendra! We always have so much fun when Kailum comes over to hang out. We don't get to see this little social bug much because his schedule is always so packed. Kailum is really one of the most genuinely nicest kids I have ever known.

I love ya K

Happy Birthday!

A little Tag about my Hubby

Okay a husband Tag- This one I can do!

(I love this Pic of Ry- Manly)

1. Who is your man? Ryan Kent Webster
2. How long have you been together? Married for 19 Months!
3. How long dated? Errr... We like to not dwell on our dating but we were engaged for a wonderful 3 months!
4. How old is your man? ALMOST 24
5. Who eats more? Depends on what it is. I can def down more pop cycles then that boy
6. Who said "I love you" first? Ry... Didn't think that would happen!
7. Who is taller? Me! ha ha Well with really tall heels on.

8. Who sings better? Well I say Ryan because its rare but when he does it- ahh I love it!
9. Who is smarter? Depends. Ryan is so smart with numbers (ha ha NERD-JK) There are times I feel like I am raising a child but more times than not I am stunned by what that boy can do.

10. Who's temper is worse? OH BOY- This is without question- MINE. Poor Ryan lives with a crazy nut!

11. Who does the laundry? Oh ME!!
12. Who does the dishes? Ry is really good at the dishes- That is one thing I HATE doing.
13. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? I do. Funny how you get a side once you get married.
14. Who pays the bills? That would be me. I think my husband would die when he really sees how much money goes to what.
15. Who has bigger feet? Ryan
16. Who has longer hair?Me
17. Who is better with the computer? Me, Only because I have to work on it everyday.
18. Who mows the lawn? Some guy!
19. Who cooks dinner? Me unless its on the BBQ.
20. Who drives when you are together? When we carpool to work together I drive while Ry sleeps! Usually any other time we switch. Unless its in his truck- in that case I rarely drive his baby.
21. Who pays when you go out? Ryan, I'm lazy and don't want to dig in the bottom less pit of my duffel bag purse.
22. Who is most stubborn? We have to both be the most stubborn people- It can make for some pretty entertaining arguments!
23. Who is the first to admit when they are wrong? Ryan is really good at it. I need to improve my "I'm Sorry" Skills.
24. Whose parents do you see the most? Ryan's parents. It gets so hard to see anyone with our schedules being so busy.
25. Who kissed who first? Ry kissed me first!
26. Who asked who out? Oh Ryan chased me for months before I finally decided to go out with him!
27. Who proposed? Umm Ryan of course. It was so sweet how he did it to!
28. Who is more sensitive? I am a little baby- I am so sensitive Ryan has learned how to talk to me esp when I am upset- he always makes me feel better.
29. Who has more friends? I think we both have lots of friends. I would have to say I tend to make more friends a lot faster but they end up being more of Ryan's friends once they start to hang out- ahh he is such a friend stealer!
30. Who has more siblings? Well he has 1 sister and I have 7 sisters, 3 brothers and 2 new sisters from my moms husband!

Devlin turns 5!

Today is a day I am realizing how fast life goes by! Devlin turns 5 today! I cant believe he has been in this world for 5 years. He is such an amazing little boy and has developed such a sweet personality! He is definitely a mini Rick!

Always being that little dare devil. I have yet to see that child without a bruise or scratch somewhere on his body because he fell off his skateboard or tripped on the air. He hardly ever cries- just gets back up and does it again! He wants to grow up and be just like his dad! He loves motorcycles, dirt bikes, wii, skateboarding and any other boy things!

Happy Birthday DBoy!

Happy Birthday Yuna!!

Yuna turned the big 8 on June 14th!

With 4 of my nieces living in Korea is so hard to be the favorite Aunt and spoil them!

I'm so glad I was able to go see Yuna and her sisters a few months ago. Whenever I see them I always develop an instant close bond. I think its because we don't have time to waste- our visits are always to short and we get straight to the point and this last trip was no exception. Ryan and I feel so close to Yuna and think about her beautiful smile whenever I need a good pick me up! I was lucky enough to go stay with my brother and his family when Yuna was born. It was so great to be able to be one of the first people to see her after she was born! She was so small and petite- which she still is. Yuna has such a zest for life and is such a passionate person. She is going to go so far in life with her ability to care so much about things.

I miss you and Love you so much Yuna! Happy Birthday!

Happy 100th Birthday Grandma!

My Grandma Murtle turned 100!!!

She is such a funny little lady. She is still doing great other than the fact she cant hear very well and refuses to wear a hearing aid so your exhausted after screaming to her for a few moments :)

My sisters Kristianne, Amy and Ashlyn planned a wonderful party to celebrate all the many year of her life and it turned out wonderful. There was so many people who came to see her I think she was overwhelmed. Grandma Murtle is such a loving person and has worked so hard for so many years- My amazing sisters take such great care of her and because of all their hard work everyday she is still able to live somewhat on her own! She has had an incredible journey through her life!

Happy Birthday!

Happy 8th Bday Tyler!!

Happy Birthday to my adorable nephew Tyler! He is getting so big I cant believe it. My little brother Jonathan and I lived with my sister Alana for a while and it was one of the best things in my life to see Tyler grow up. We were able to be there when he took his first steps. He is such a sweet and talented little boy! Happy Birthday Ty!

Happy Birthday Amy

My sister Amy turned the big 30! She had a little BBQ at her house to celebrate! Its fun to get together with family and see everyone. I wish we could do it more but with 10 brothers and sisters that are all busy with their own families it can get pretty difficult.

Beautiful Girls

These are a few of my beautiful nieces!

GaRdEn

My little garden is growing! I love to watch all my little plants getting big. We have little penos (Jalapenos) tomato's, peppers, strawberries, cucumber, zucchini, peas and oregano!

What a beautiful morning!

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.

-Albert Einstein

(As I drove to school early this morning this was the beautiful sky above my house!)

How do you go from where you are to where you want to be? I think you have to have an enthusiasm for life. You have to have a dream, a goal and you have to be willing to work for it.

- Jim Valvano